


Wednesday

by bee7



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Falling In Love, Fuckbuddies, Getting Together, Jaebum will always be a soft baby on my fics, M/M, like really biefly, very briefly jaebum/ofc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 14:11:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13249887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bee7/pseuds/bee7
Summary: The next time they have sex Jaebum looks for signs, he doesn’t know why he does it or just what he is looking for, he just wants to see if he can find something. Maybe a sign that they are actually in a relationship but forgot to tell each other, maybe a sign that Jaebum really likes Youngjae but wasn’t able to see it. He doesn’t know if he finds anything, it’s just sex, he fucks Youngjae and they both get off, it’s good and Jaebum feels something expanding in his chest when he kisses Youngjae after they are done. Wait- what?





	Wednesday

“Hey, where you going?” Jaebum mumbles into his pillow, it’s way too early for all these noises and clarity.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up, I have to go.” Youngjae places a soft kiss on his back, Jaebum opens a eye so he can see the other boy dressing himself on last night’s clothes.

“Why? Come back to bed, it’s too cold here without you on it,” he groans, he doesn’t know why Youngjae has to leave so early, they usually have breakfast together when he spends the night.

“I told you my best friend has a dance competition today, I can’t be late. Also you have a blanket use it to warm you up,” Youngjae chuckles and gives a quick peck on Jaebum’s lips. “Sleep a little more, you deserve it. I will see you later.”

Jaebum turns on his back so he can kiss Youngjae goodbye, it’s something they started doing three months ago, they don’t have a reason apart from the fact that it feels nice. They should be kissing each other goodbye since the start. Youngjae holds Jaebum’s face on his hands, caressing the other boy for a bit before letting go. “Ok, I really have to go. Bye.”

He wants to tell Youngjae to have fun at the competition and that he will text him later but he can’t open his eyes again, he is just too sleepy and too tired from last night. Jaebum met up with Youngjae at a party they went and then they came back to Jaebum’s place together, just like they’ve been doing for months now. They fucked twice and Jaebum is kinda sore, he just wants to sleep in, later he has to work on a paper, for now he just wants to go back to the dream he was having before waking up.

Several hours later Jaebum is watching a movie with Jackson and Jinyoung, he still has to work on his paper but it will have to wait, it’s very comfy here and his back kinda hurts.

“Didn’t Youngjae spend the night?” Jackson asks, his eyes not leaving the TV.

“He did but he had to leave, something about his friend dancing and he having to watch it.” Jackson just hums in response. His focus on the movie, a little after it Jinyoung speaks up too.

“When will you two finally start dating and whatnot, these hooks up are getting a bit old aren’t they? I think you two are dating already, to be honest.” Jinyoung is probably a bit bored since he, differently from Jackson, isn’t even looking at the TV, all his attention towards Jaebum. Jaebum chokes on his coke.

“What? What the fuck, Jinyoungie? I’m- We are not dating, where is this coming from? We just friends who fuck, we are not even that close to be called friends I guess.”

“But you like him,” Jackson says, his eyes still on the movie but apparently he can multitask if it’s to annoy Jaebum.

“I don’t? I like sleeping with him and he is nice to hang with but that’s it, you two know I don’t do relationships.” The thing is Jaebum doesn’t have a problem with relationships, if he ever likes someone he will date them, probably. He is not running from commitment, but it just never happened, he never felt like he needed someone so bad that he would want to date them. He is okay doing one-night stands and he lets his best friends know it.

“Yeah, but when was the last time you hooked up with anyone who wasn’t Youngjae? You’ve been seeing each other for what? Five months? Every time we go out you two go back to somewhere together… I haven’t seen you even kissing anyone else, you are already in a relationship if you think about it.” Jinyoung has a mischievous look on his face, like he knows exactly what he is doing to Jaebum’s head.

“It’s been a while, yeah…” Jaebum doesn’t want to let him know that it’s actually almost seven month since he first met and hooked up with Youngjae, and six months since he tried something with anyone else. It’s not because he likes Youngjae, it’s just… it seems dumb, they are always at the same places and it works between them just fine, they like having sex with each other, why would Jaebum look for someone else? It just seems stupid to him, he might hook up with someone who is not worth his time, it might not even be good, the person might want something more from him, while Youngjae is always there, it’s always good with him, they know exactly what to give and what to take from one another, why would he bother with other people? “But, it’s just convenient, Youngjae is always there and I’m always there so we fuck, no biggie.”

Jaebum can feel a little of his confidence leaving his body, he was sure about it and he still knows it is not a big deal but suddenly he feels a bit unsure, they are not exclusive but Jaebum acts as if they were, they are not in a relationship even if it feels as if they are sometimes, they are _not._

“Just convenient… right. Listen, Jaebum, there’s nothing wrong letting yourself like someone for once, he is a good guy, isn’t he? I’m sure having a relationship wouldn’t be all that bad to you.” Jinyoung gives him a bright smile, as if he is giving Jaebum the best advice the other boy could ever receive. But it’s not like that, alright? He is not scared of liking Youngjae, definitely not scared that the other boy won’t feel the same way about him. He is not scared at all.

“It’s really not like that guys. Don’t worry about it.”

 

*

 

The next time they have sex Jaebum looks for signs, he doesn’t know why he does it or just what he is looking for, he just wants to see if he can find something. Maybe a sign that they are actually in a relationship but forgot to tell each other, maybe a sign that Jaebum really likes Youngjae but wasn’t able to see it. He doesn’t know if he finds anything, it’s just sex, he fucks Youngjae and they both get off, it’s good and Jaebum feels something expanding in his chest when he kisses Youngjae after they are done. Wait- what?

“Youngjae?” He doesn’t even know what he wants to say, he just has to say something, what’s this weird feeling? It must be nothing, he is probably getting confused because of what dumb Jinyoung said the other day.

“Yeah?” Youngjae is clinging to him, they are at Jaebum’s place again and he has a large bed but Youngjae always cuddle to him like his life depends on it. Jaebum sees that he is almost asleep, his breathing even, he looks so beautiful and so peaceful, Youngjae looks like an angel nothing like the boy that was demanding to come a few minutes ago, right now he looks so innocent and vulnerable. Jaebum wants to protect him, and just what is this feeling? He has never in his entire life felt the urge to take care of someone else.

“Nevermind, sleep now, yeah?” Jaebum kisses his sweaty hair, placing it behind his ear. Youngjae is just beautiful, that’s probably what’s messing with Jaebum’s head. He is beautiful and he clings to Jaebum, of course it will make him feel something, it’s probably something every men feels, it’s not a big deal.

 

*

 

They are at a frat party, Jaebum doesn’t like parties like this one because they are always packed and you can barely walk around, the boys like it because they can dance and hump on each other, another reason for Jaebum to not like it. They wanted to come though, so he came with them, the beer is alright, so there’s that.

“Where is your boy, Jaebum?” Jackson asks way too loud on his ear, the place is noisy, the music too loud but Jackson is loud too he doesn’t have to scream like that.

Jaebum rolls his eyes, he doesn’t have a boy, he thought a lot about it, and he will admit that maybe he likes Youngjae a little but he isn’t in love with him and they are not in a relationship, they are friends, that’s it. Jackson didn’t mentioned his name, but Jaebum knows he is talking about Youngjae, he should tell him that Youngjae is not his boy but he doesn’t feel like bothering with it right now.

“He can’t make it tonight, something about a project he has to finish.” Jaebum replies. Jackson and Jinyoung are all over each other, it feels weird to Jaebum being here by himself, he is not used to it and it’s not because he likes Youngjae or anything, it’s just the fact that they’ve been doing it for too long now for it not be weird when he is all by himself.

“Oh, so that’s your chance to hook up with someone else and prove that you haven’t fallen for my baby otter.” Jackson says happily, Jaebum doesn’t know why he is so happy about it, maybe he wants to mock Jaebum and that’s the reason why he is so cheerful about Jaebum hooking up with someone else.

The thing is that Jackson was the one who introduced Jaebum and Youngjae, Youngjae was Jackson’s friend first and they are quite close, Jinyoung being Jackson’s boyfriend and Jaebum’s best friend and roommate it was just natural that they would meet each other eventually but one one could imagine that they would hit it off as they did.

“I don’t have to prove you anything, Jacks. I will find someone nice to go home with, don’t worry about my one-night stands, alright?”

Jaebum does find someone, a pretty short girl, she is delicate and just Jaebum’s type, they make out for a long time but it doesn’t feel right, she doesn’t feel right. The girl is too short, Jaebum has to lean down so they can kiss, her hair is a curly and a bright shade of red. Her lips are too soft and Jaebum doesn’t feel like doing it anymore. She asks him if he wants to find a room so they can be more comfortable, but he doesn’t, he kindly tells her that they should but maybe another time and excuses himself.

Jaebum sits at the porch, he sees some girls making out and a boy throwing up, he doesn’t feel like being here anymore, suddenly all he can think about is Youngjae’s tiny moles on his back, Youngjae’s long black hair, the way their lips fit together perfectly. He doesn’t know why he can’t stop thinking about the younger boy, when he felt the girl’s perfume it felt so wrong Jaebum had to back off instantly, all he wants to feel right now is Youngjae’s smell, how their colognes smell when they bodies are connected.

They haven’t seen each other since last week, and since they only see each other at the weekends and sometimes briefly at the uni cafeteria Jaebum supposes he won’t be seeing Youngjae again till next weekend. It will be two weeks without seeing the younger boy and it doesn’t feel right either, he feels something stuck on his throat. Without thinking much about it Jaebum gets his phone and calls Youngjae, he must be awake since he has to work on his project.

“Yo, Jaebum, everything alright man?” Youngjae sounds worried, of course he does, why would Jaebum call Youngjae when he is out partying on a Friday night.

“Huh? Oh, everything is fine. I just- are you done with your project? Have you eaten something?” Jaebum feels pathetic, he facepalms, what is he doing right now.

Youngjae seems to light up a bit, the worry leaving his voice mostly, “I just submitted it, I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to, my internet connection is so bad right now, you wouldn’t believe it. I haven’t, but I will, it’s a bit late to order food so I’m going to have some ice cream and go to bed.”

“You can’t have ice cream for dinner, you will be sick.” Jaebum huffs, he hates how Youngjae can be irresponsible when it comes to his own health sometimes, he will go hours sometimes a entire day without eating, just being too focused on his school work. He works very hard to keep his scholarship, Jaebum knows it about the boy and he admires it but Youngjae should pay more attention to his meals and his sleep schedule, the boy never sleeps. “I will come over and bring something to you, don’t fall asleep before I get there.”

“No. Jaebum, you don’t have to-”

But Jaebum won’t have it, he doesn’t feel like being at this dumb party anymore anyways, he is sick of it and he misses Youngjae, not that he will say it. “Don’t even try to fight me on this, just wait up. I will be there soon.”

He gets at Youngjae’s place not even thirty minutes later, he knows the boy has been working a lot on his assignments this past week, he is probably tired and wants to rest so Jaebum didn’t want him to fall asleep before he could get there.

Youngjae looks very tired indeed, Jaebum would be able to see his dark circles even if he was standing five miles away, his hair is on a tiny ponytail, it looks cute, Jaebum didn’t even know it was long enough for him to manage to use it like this. He is standing there only on his shirt and it has a weird red stain on it, Jaebum feels like kissing him, but he doesn’t.

“Here, I brought you some pasta, I know it’s not the most healthy thing on Earth but it has vegetables on it.” Jaebum says handing Youngjae the box the got for him.

“You didn’t have to but I appreciate, come on sit with me,” Youngjae is looking at him adorably, Jaebum drank a little so he assumes that’s why he can’t stop himself from reach to the boy and kissing the tip of his nose. Youngjae looks very surprised but then he just giggles and gives Jaebum a can of coke. “You look good, by the way.”

Youngjae is eyeing his outfit, Jaebum had almost forgotten that he was at a party before coming here and that he is dressed on his party clothes, which means tight and black, he blushes lightly, he doesn’t want to acknowledge the fact that he was partying but left as soon as the opportunity to be with Youngjae showed up. “Well, thank you I know how I look. You look a mess, I’m not sure if you are aware of that.”

Youngjae laughs loudly, the way Jaebum likes, he also doesn’t want to think about the fact that he has Youngjae’s laughs cataloged and that he has his favorites, no, not thinking about it right now. “Excuse you, I wasn’t expecting for a hot boy to bring me food out of nowhere, this is how I look when I don’t have to woo you.”

Something shifts inside Jaebum’s stomach, holy shit it’s like something is living there, Youngjae will do something cute and it will get crazy inside him making his insides melt, it feels awful. What he means with woo Jaebum anyways? Jaebum should think about it later too.

They chat for a bit while Youngjae eats, he tells Jaebum about the project he just finished, he talks about his professor and then he is talking about a new movie he wants to watch. It’s all random they are talking about anything that come to their minds, Jaebum doesn’t even realize it when he asks Youngjae if he wants to go to the movies together so they can watch whatever is it that Youngjae wants to watch. Youngjae give him _The Favorite_ smile, the one in which his eyes almost disappear completely and he looks like he is shining, lighting up the entire room. Honestly, Jaebum doesn’t know why he does it, he wasn’t thinking but Youngjae looks so happy when he agrees to it that Jaebum can’t find it on himself to take it back.

“Thanks for the food, it was delicious. You didn’t have to leave the party just to bring me food though, I feel kinda bad, you should be having fun.”

“I’m fine right where I am. Don’t worry about it, Jae.” And he is, he is fine right here, he feels way better being here than he felt at that stupid party, he would rather look at Youngjae’s tired and messy appearance than at anyone else.

“You know, I’m very tired… I don’t feel like having sex, it’s that alright?” Youngjae looks so unsure of himself, Jaebum hates it. He didn’t come here with the thought of sex on his mind, he couldn’t care less about it right now, all he wanted was to make sure Youngjae was okay and that he would eat something. But he understands why Youngjae would think that that was what Jaebum was after, they have never, not even once, hanged out without the promise of sex, but Jaebum feels like it’s never too late for a first time.

“I don’t- That’s fine, I just wanted to check on you.” Jaebum is not entirely sober but he is not drunk either, there’s no excuse for him to say things like that without shame, but he is a bit brave tonight.

“That’s good, do you want to spend the night, though? It’s late and you are already here… so you could, y’know…” Jaebum knows, so he does. He spends the night and they don’t do anything remotely sexual, they just cuddle, Youngjae is asleep as soon as his body hits the mattress. He looks very tired but also content, Jaebum is content too.

The next day they do fuck though, it’s good and Jaebum spends almost the entire day at Youngjae’s place, he only leaves at the end of the day, Youngjae kisses him goodbye at the door and Jaebum feels like he is on cloud nine.

When he gets home Jackson is on his face before he can even take his shoes off, “So you did it. You cheated on Youngjae!” He is laughing loudly, “Oh my god, who was it? You look so happy, I can’t believe just because he missed one single party you already found yourself someone else and look this happy, you even spent the entire day out. Who was it?”

Does Jaebum look happy? He hasn’t realized it but he has a big smile on his face, god he probably smiled all the way here like a creepy. “We aren’t dating so I didn’t cheat, let go of me, you have a boyfriend of your own.”

Jaebum tries to go to his room but then Jinyoung is right at his face too, “Was it that girl you were kissing? Wow, I didn’t think you had it on you to hook up with someone after so long doing it just with Youngjae, guess I was wrong about you.” Jinyoung looks thoughtful and Jaebum wants to tell him that he didn’t hook up with anyone new, that he spent the night and the day with Youngjae, but how he explains to them that he couldn’t be apart from the boy so he went after him? How he explains it without sounding like he is ridiculously gone for Youngjae? He isn’t but he knows how it will sound.

“You look so happy, it’s weird, I think you got yourself a girlfriend. Poor Jae will be heartbroken,” Jackson isn’t laughing anymore, he really looks sorry for Youngjae, as if he had a reason to be. This is all a mess.

“Guys, let go, I didn’t sleep with anyone, ok? I was just out with a… friend. Yeah, a friend! I didn’t get myself a girlfriend, don’t worry about Youngjae, Jacks. I will take a shower and take a nap please don’t bother me and don’t be loud,” he says the last part specifically to Jackson.

 

*

 

The following week goes by too slowly for Jaebum’s liking, he can’t wait to see Youngjae. He doesn’t have a reason to feel like this apart from the fact that he misses the other boy, he can’t deny it anymore, they got closer but that’s it. He probably can call Youngjae his friend now and it’s weird going a week without seeing a close friend, they text and even video call each other but it’s not the same, Jaebum wants to see him, he wants to touch the younger boy.

Jaebum decides to text him, it’s Wednesday, he has never seen Youngjae on a Wednesday but he just wants to know what the other boy is up to.

 

_me - 02:32 PM_

_what r u up to_

 

_yj <3 - 2:44 PM _

_im stuck at the library w my dumb classmates_

_its been hours i cant look at their faces anymore_

 

Youngjae says it’s been hours, Jaebum wonders if he had lunch, it’s pretty late he shouldn’t go hours without eating like that, he shouldn’t care nor should he ask, but he can’t help it, the idea of Youngjae being upset and hungry makes him uncomfortable.

 

_me - 2:46 PM_

_what floor r u guys on?_

_r u using one of the study rooms?_

 

_yj <3 - 2: 51 PM _

_3rd floor_

_yeah i feel like i cant breathe in here is so packed_

_why_

 

Jaebum doesn’t bother replying it’s almost three in the afternoon and Youngjae is stuck on a library working on a project that he hates with people he hates, Jaebum knows that because he is constantly complaining about them. He isn’t too far away from the library and he is just next to the nicest coffee shop on campus, Jaebum decides treating Youngjae. It’s not a big deal, he just cares about all of his friends, he would do it for any of them and since Youngjae is his friend now he should do it for him as well.

He knocks on two study room doors before getting the right one, “Is Youngjae here?” He asks a tall girl, she has purple hair, Jaebum thinks it looks pretty cool but her face tells him she wants him gone.

“He is, but he is busy, we are working here.” She tries closing the door on Jaebum’s face but he is faster, he has his hands full but he can get inside before she can close the door completely.

“I will be quick don’t worry.” He smiles at her, he understands that she is in a moody, if they’ve been here for hours Youngjae can’t be the only one tired and hungry. The room is really packed, Jaebum thinks that there’s at least ten people here, the space so tiny it was probably made for five or six people.

He spots Youngjae at the corner on the back talking to a blonde boy, they both seem distressed, some of Youngjae’s classmates are looking at Jaebum with a scowl. He really should be quick, so he approaches Youngjae, the boy turns to him, his face is surprised then happy then surprised again. “Jaebum, what are you doing here?”

“I don’t like it when you overwork yourself and don’t eat anything,” Jaebum hands him an iced coffee and a bag with some pastry, he knows it’s a bit rude to feed only Youngjae but he doesn’t know these other people and it’s not like he could feed ten of them anyways. “So, I brought you this, please eat some of it.”

Youngjae doesn’t say anything, he looks at his classmates, basically everyone is looking at them right now, Youngjae looks so red, Jaebum would mock him but he is feeling quite shy as well. Did he overstep here? Was it too much? He was just worrying about a friend!

“Hum, guys, give me a second I will be right back,” Youngjae takes his hands so they can leave the study room, he closes the door after him but they don’t go far, staying just outside the room. “You didn’t have to do it, but I’m… thank you. I’m happy to see your face and also the food, of course.”

Before Jaebum can reassures him that is nothing and that he doesn’t have to worry about it Youngjae is kissing him, he puts his hands on Jaebum’s face so he can kiss him softly and slowly, just their lips. Youngjae’s lips are soft but just in the right way, his hands feels so good on his face. Jaebum can’t help bringing their bodies closer, both his arms pulling the smaller boy on an embrace, it just feels so good he doesn’t want it to end.

They only kiss in two occasions, when it’s about sex be it before, during or after, and when they kiss goodbye, Jaebum knows they both like the goodbye kisses, it’s always soft and they are like a promise that they will be seeing each other again. But they never kiss when sex is not an option, they never kiss just because, Youngjae has never kissed him like this as if Jaebum is something precious to him, something that he holds dear.

“I will pay you back, yeah?”

This is not what Jaebum wants, not at all, “No, no, you don’t have to pay me back, it’s not a bi-”

“Don’t say it’s not a big deal, it’s a big deal to me, stupid. But I mean, I will pay you back with,” he then proceeds to whisper on Jaebum’s ear, “my mouth… I’ll be done here in like two hours, if you can wait for me we can go back to my apartment. I’ll make it worth to you.”

Youngjae looks nothing like the angel he is most of the time, he looks like a kid who is about to do something he isn’t supposed to, Jaebum loves that, he kisses Youngjae again, turns out kissing just because you can feels pretty nice, also Youngjae is addicting like that. Youngjae mumbles that he has to go back between kisses.

“I will be here at five so we can leave, yeah?” Jaebum can hear how hopeful his voice sounds but he doesn’t care, Youngjae is smiling at him and he can’t stop smiling back, this is so good, this feeling that he doesn’t know what it is, this thing is just too good, he hopes he will never stop feeling like that.

“Yeah,” Youngjae kisses him goodbye and it’s just about one of the best kisses of Jaebum’s life, he can feel his body shivering and he wants more of it, he tries to deepen the kiss but Youngjae bites his lips and tells him later before he is going back into the study room. Jaebum stays at the library so he can study till Youngjae is done, he tries to concentrate but all he can think about is Youngjae’s lips on his. The smile on his face must look creepy again.

On their way to Youngjae’s apartment they can’t take their hands off of each other, Jaebum hasn’t ever seen him so affectionate if he knew all it would take was coffee and some pastry he would have done it sooner. They go right to Youngjae’s room, he can hear Yugyeom yelling something about his eyes or some shit like that but all Jaebum cares about is getting Youngjae under him already.

Youngjae is kissing at his neck slowly, he has taken Jaebum’s shirt off and is taking his sweet time kissing at his moles going back to Jaebum’s mouth from time to time to kiss him deeply, it’s making Jaebum’s head spin. “You know, Deandra, the girl with the purple hair, she said-- she told me…” Youngjae is back at his mouth kissing him, he is demanding and Jaebum is giving it to him. Youngjae lets his tongue explore Jaebum’s mouth slowly, he will lick and suck softly at Jaebum’s own tongue and Jaebum really need things to speed up, he tries to say as much but Youngjae is already pushing him on the bed.

“She said… that my boyfriend should not disturb our work, because…” another kiss, “because it’s distracting. I think she meant you’re distracting with your pretty face, pretty moles, pretty lips.” Youngjae kisses at the moles over his eye and then at his lips. “I told her to mind her own business.”

Jaebum hears it all but all he can make sense of is the fact that the girl thought Jaebum was Youngjae’s boyfriend and the boy didn’t correct her, he didn’t mind and he is here kissing Jaebum stupid and telling him about what happened. Jaebum thinks it means something, but he can’t think straight, not with Youngjae’s mouth getting closer and closer to his dick.

“Jae-”

“I was so surprised when I saw you there, I never thought-” Youngjae lowers Jaebum’s pants taking his underwear with it, it’s disturbing how Jaebum is completely naked under him but Youngjae still all clothed, Jaebum would never imagine how hot it could be, but it is, it is so hot just looking at him makes his dick drip with precum. “I like it… the way you’ve been treating me lately. I like how it makes me feel, do you know how it makes me feel, Jaebum?”

Jaebum shakes his head because he feels like he has to, but he knows Youngjae plans on telling him either way. “It makes me feel important, as if you care about me… I like it.” They are staring into each other eyes, Jaebum can’t look away, Youngjae looks so good between his legs. He doesn’t warn Jaebum before he lets his mouth fall to Jaebum’s cock, sucking lightly at the head. Jaebum can’t help crying out.

Youngjae looks sinful, they don’t break eye contact and it’s the hottest thing ever, Jaebum has received a lot of blowjobs, Youngjae has sucked him off before a bunch of times but it never felt like that, he never felt like he was walking into heaven. Youngjae won’t take his eyes away from him, his tongue is working Jaebum, he lets it circle the head and he really feels like he is about to cry here.

Jaebum holds on the back of Youngjae’s neck with one hand and puts the other on the corner of the boy’s mouth, he can see and feel his dick there. Youngjae winks at him as if he knows exactly what he is doing to Jaebum, he probably do, he must know or else he wouldn’t look so pleased with himself. Youngjae takes his mouth off of Jaebum just so he can grip at his dick with one of his hands, then he starts giving it licks, he licks all of Jaebum’s length, making it impossibly wet and blowing hot breath over it. It’s so good, just so good, Jaebum doesn’t even care that he is being loud, he can’t help it.

“I will show you just how grateful I am, yeah?” Youngjae kisses at the tip again but he doesn’t waste more time, he goes right into it deep throating Jaebum, bobbing his head up and down slowly at first. Jaebum’s eyes are rolling back on his skull, he can’t think, he can’t barely breathe right now, he tries looking down at Youngjae but it’s just too much, Youngjae never looked at him like that, he has fire on his eyes.

Jaebum lets his hand go to Youngjae’s throat and he can feel his dick moving there, he feels it and Youngjae hums, the vibrations can be felt on his entire body, his body shakes with it. “Jae, holy fuck, baby, please--” Youngjae speeds up, he keeps taking him all the way in, there are tears on the corner of his eyes but he doesn’t stop. His mouth is so hot and so wet around Jaebum, it’s tight and wet, Jaebum groans he can feel his orgasm approaching but he doesn’t want it to be over just yet, “Jae, slow down, baby--” instead of listening to him Youngjae locks their eyes again and fondles Jaebum’s balls in his hands, Jaebum knows that there is not coming back from this, he feels his dick pulsing and the heat on his lower stomach getting uncontrollable.

Jaebum tries to warn Youngjae but all the boy does is encourage him by patting at his hips for him to move as well, he opens his mouth wider so Jaebum can fuck into it but he manages only three thrusts, then he is coming in Youngjae’s throat and the boy is working him through it like a pro that he is. He gets sensitive way too soon and Youngjae is moving away from his legs, Jaebum is disappointed he wanted it to keep going for hours. “Come here, baby,”

Jaebum has never called Youngjae anything but Youngjae or Jae at times, calling him baby is new but neither of them seem to care. He doesn’t care right now, all he cares at the moment is being closer to Youngjae. Youngjae strips down from his clothes lying all naked over Jaebum. “Give me a hand, will you?” He tries to joke but he is breathless, his voice hoarse from having his mouth fucked, Jaebum thinks that boy has never sounded so good in his entire life.

Youngjae is working himself, he got the lube from under his pillows so he could make the slide better, his pace is slow and not too tight at first, he is kissing at the corner of Jaebum’s mouth and it never felt like that, little kisses like that never felt so intimate, they have fucked so many times Jaebum can’t even count all of them but it never felt so intimate as it feels at the moment. Youngjae is jerking himself and Jaebum is only looking down but it feels like they are sharing something important here.

Then Jaebum hand finds Youngjae’s, he bats the younger boy hand away so he can give him the hand he asked for, he starts slowly too, feeling Youngjae’s hot skin, twisting his grip lightly, brushing over the head a few times till Youngjae is panting on his neck begging him to go faster. Jaebum doesn’t want to torture him tonight, all he wants is to make him feel good. He goes faster, his grip getting tighter, he will twist Youngjae’s dick and change the pace a little till it’s perfect, till he is doing it the way he knows his boy likes it.

Jaebum brings his middle finger to Youngjae’s entrance, since he is dry he won’t enter him but he circles his rim while he bumps his fist and shoves his tongue into Youngjae’s mouth kissing him sensually, the noise Youngjae makes when he comes have to be the most obscene sound Jaebum has ever heard. Youngjae comes on Jaebum’s stomach making a mess of it, but it’s alright, it’s alright and Jaebum doesn’t mind, all he can do is turn them around so he is on top of Youngjae, he keeps kissing him softly.

He would think Youngjae has fallen asleep but he still kissing him back, his hands playing with the hair on the back of Jaebum’s hair, he has his eyes closed his face looking peaceful. “You know, what day is it today?”

“Wednesday,” Youngjae answers softly, his voice is low and he must be about to fall asleep, his smiles at Jaebum, just a tiny smile, it’s a new smile, Jaebum tries to memorize it.

“Yeah, Wednesday. We should… we should to that more often, I like it. Seeing you at Wednesday, I like it.” Youngjae nods kissing him again, smile never leaving his face. They both know it’s not about it being Wednesday, it’s about it not being the weekend, it’s about them not being drunk and hooking up after a party or even on a dirty bathroom of some stupid club. It’s about Jaebum bringing food when Youngjae is overworking, it’s about Youngjae not telling his classmate that Jaebum is not his boyfriend, it’s about Jaebum calling him ‘baby’ and none of them having a problem with it.

 

*

 

After it things change between them, the shift on their dynamics is obvious, literally everyone can see it, Jinyoung tries to talk to him about it but Jaebum just ignores it, he likes how things are right now, he doesn’t want to acknowledge anything and maybe mess it up.

But they don’t see each other only at the weekends anymore, they see each other a lot more, almost every Wednesday they will do something together, it’s like dates but they never call it dates. They go watch the movie Youngjae wanted to see and they hold hands on the way there, none of them say anything but they look at each other like idiots, Jaebum feels so fond of the other boy, he wants to keep him by his side and by his side only. They haven’t had the talk about being exclusive, Jaebum is too scared to bring it up, what if Youngjae laughs at his face and says he is out of his mind for even thinking that someone like him would ever settle down for someone like Jaebum? It doesn’t seem realistic, Youngjae is nice he wouldn’t be so cruel but it doesn’t change the way Jaebum feels.

It makes him anxious, he doesn’t even look at other people, he has eyes only for Youngjae and he really wants Youngjae to feel the same way about him, even imagining the boy with someone else makes his blood boil in his veins. It’s not that Jaebum is possessive, he might be a little, but he can kind of admit it that he likes, really _likes_ Youngjae now and he doesn’t like sharing. He wants the boy for himself, but he doesn’t know how to ask for it.

“I have a problem,” Jaebum enters Jinyoung room, he doesn’t bother knocking just lies on the bed besides his best friend. He knows he looks pitiful, he needs help and he will get it, Jinyoung doesn’t look impressed though, he is probably used to Jaebum’s antics.

“What do you want?”

“Jinyoungie… how do I tell Youngjae that I don’t want him fucking anyone else but me?” Jinyoung looks surprised just for one second but then he is laughing loudly, Jaebum hates his laugh he wants to push him right in the face, “What’s so funny about it? I have a problem, be a best friend and help me out!”

He doesn’t stop laughing though, “I’m sorry,” giggles, “it’s just sometimes I forget you’re new at it and that you have never dated anyone. It’s just so funny this has been going for so long and you two still haven’t had this talk? This is embarrassing,”

Jaebum rubs his hands on his face trying to keep the blush at bay, he knows it, he knows he is bad at this whole thing but so is Youngjae, he has never dated anyone either and they are not even dating yet, not officially anyways, it’s a disaster cos they don’t know what they are doing. “I don’t know what to do, ok? I like him, I like him a lot, I might be even… I might be falling for him, but I don’t know how to tell him this without scaring him, I don’t want to lose him but I also can’t keep doing things like we are doing right now, I really want to tell my mom I have a boyfriend.”

Jinyoung laughs again and Jaebum is losing his patience here, “Sorry, but you put it like all you care about is having a boyfriend to show your mom,” Jaebum makes a face, he doesn’t have time for it, he needs a solution. “Ok, listen up. Just talk to him, alright? I’m pretty sure he feels the same way about you, but even if he doesn’t you two have to sort this out, tell him how you feel and see how things work out.”

“See how things work out? Jinyoung! This doesn’t sound smart, what if the doesn’t want to be my boyfriend? Then I will just lose him… forever.”

Jinyoung doesn’t laugh anymore, he looks bored, well to that Jaebum is used at least. “Oh my god, you sound as dramatic as a fifteen year old having his first crush, you won’t lose him forever stop with the drama. You will talk to him like the adults that you both are and there will be no misunderstandings, you already act like boyfriends anyways this is just a label, just talk to him and stop crying on your room because of the thought of him sticking his dick on other butts.”

“I have never and will never cry over it.” Really he hasn’t, but he might, if Youngjae ever tells him that he doesn’t want to do it with him he might cry, he doesn’t even like thinking about this possibility. His head is a mess right now but he really should act like an adult for once, Jinyoung is right. “Thank you, I will… I will talk to him, eventually...”

A month and a half later Jaebum still hasn’t said anything, he can’t bring himself to, this is sad though, they’ve been doing it for almost ten months, god soon it will be one whole year. An entire year and Jaebum hasn’t been sleeping around with anyone else, he is doing the whole exclusivity thing and he doesn’t even know if Youngjae is doing it as well, he would be doing it anyways because he doesn’t feel like being with anyone else either way but he needs to know where they stand. He just doesn’t have the balls to do it, but he has to, soon enough he will, he has a plan.

They are watching random episodes of Steven Universe on Youngjae’s laptop, but Jaebum can’t pay attention to it, Youngjae fucked him early and it was… well it was something else, they held hands, they have never held hands while they were having sex, it felt so intimate, Jaebum almost cried, he had to close his eyes so Youngjae wouldn’t see the tears on them, he can’t be crying during sex when they are not even official yet, this is not how things work, at least thinks so.

“You remember that short film I had to work on the past two months?” Jaebum will do it, it’s now or never.

“Of course I do, it was about how second generation of Latino immigrants live in America right now, isn’t it? I’m excited to see it,” Youngjae kisses his cheek quickly, “why?”

He is paying attention to Jaebum and it’s just so endearing the way he looks at Jaebum, it’s everything he has ever wanted and he didn’t even know it. “There will be an event at uni, my professor will be holding it so a bunch of short films will be showed, really it will be just a bunch of pretentious film students trying to show off, but well he will show our short film and I’d like if… if you went with me… as-- as my date, you know.”

Jaebum has no idea why Youngjae looks so surprised, it’s obvious that he would want him to be there at his side, right? It was so hard getting the words out, he is blushing so hard, the more Youngjae looks at him without saying anything more of his blood runs to his face, it is burning.

“Yeah, sure. I’d love to go with you. When is it?”

“Next Wednesday, six o’clock, it will be at the film and photography department, I can pick you up,” Youngjae nods smiling at him, the soft and fond smile Jaebum loves so much. He can feel the nervousness leaving his body when Youngjae agrees to it, he doesn’t know why he felt so anxious in the first place. “You know I don’t like this show much, I’m a bit sore but we can go again if you want,”

Youngjae laughs, The Loudest Laugh, the one where he throws his head back and it hits the pillow, “you are such a slut for it, aren’t you? God, I can’t keep you satisfied for more than forty minutes,” there’s no heat to it, he kisses Jaebum and there _is_ heat to _it._

 

*

 

Next week Jaebum is so nervous, is not even about the showing of the short film, he worked hard on it but the professor already graded their projects, also he didn’t work on it alone, he directed some of it and worked on the editing part but it’s all already done and the people there aren’t special either. The only special person there will be Youngjae. And Jaebum has is all planned, they will go together and they will watch as many films as Youngjae can endure, he knows some of them will be boring, after it he will take Youngjae to a fancy restaurant, he saved up for this moment and then he will confess.

Jinyoung says it isn’t exactly confessing when you’ve been fucking a guy for almost an year and they pretty much are in a relationship already, but it doesn’t matter to Jaebum, he has never had it, he has never fallen for anyone or even dated anyone, he wants to let Youngjae know exactly how he feels, he wants to do it right. If he’s lucky enough Youngjae will say he likes him back and Jaebum will facetime his mother so he can introduce them, well tomorrow because tonight he plans on doing other things.

Everything will be perfect. He keeps telling himself it in his head till he believes it.

It doesn’t seem perfect though, Youngjae looks amazing, Jaebum loses his voice when he sees the boy. He is wearing a baby blue buttons down shirt and he even has a fancy jacket over it, he looks so expensive, he is also wearing his specs and he got his hair trimmed. Jaebum wants to devour him. They are holding hands but it’s uncomfortable, nothing like Jaebum imagined, his hands are sweating, Youngjae seems to be happy to be here but Jaebum can’t stop freaking out. What if things are going too fast, what if they are not ready for it just yet?

He can’t stop overthinking, Youngjae tries to engage him in conversation but he can’t pay attention for long enough, all he can think is about the reservations he made at the most expensive restaurant in the city, he is not sure if he booked it for the right night, he can’t remember it he will have to call the place-

“Hey, Jaebum, so nice to see you.” Janet is here, it’s just what Jaebum needed right now, he can’t stop overthinking, he is sweating, Youngjae seems uncomfortable and fucking Janet is all over him. She was part of the group he had to work with on the short film project, she’s also been flirting with him for almost two years, she can’t get a hint it seems.

“Janet,” Jaebum tries to smile at her but he can’t, he is too annoyed, nothing is going the way he wanted them to go and is all because he is overthinking it, there’s nothing happening but he is hyperventilating. “Good seeing you too.”

“Oh, who is this?” Janet is looking at Youngjae curiously, she always overdo it, too interested on who is Jaebum friend, he doesn’t know why. They are holding hands but for some reason Jaebum lets go of it, he doesn’t know why he does it but he fucking does.

“This is my… my friend, Youngjae. Youngjae this is my classmate Janet,” Jaebum sees it the moment Youngjae’s face drops, he can’t even hide it. Jaebum knows he is probably being a dick but how could he introduce Youngjae as his boyfriends when they haven’t even talked about it yet? When he haven’t had the chance to confess. He shouldn’t have dropped Youngjae’s hand, he tries holding it back but Youngjae puts his free hand on the pocket of his pants, his other hand busy with a glass of white wine.

“Don’t be like that, Jaebum. We are not just classmates, we’ve been friends for years now, we worked together on this film you will be watching tonight, Youngjae. We got even closer after it, it was a bonding experience.” Janet is overly happy, Jaebum rolls his eyes, she might as well be delusional, they didn’t get closer they just exchanged numbers and that was because they had to. They haven’t talked not even once after they were done with the film.

“Huh, nice to meet you, Janet…” Youngjae looks so confused, Jaebum wants to fucking die, he wants to get the boy by his hands and leave so he can confess already and take this pained look away from his face. But he can’t, he has to stay at least for another hour or two so he can see his film on the big screen.

“Nice seeing you indeed, Janet. But we have to go now, so we can take good seats, see you around.” She looks like she wants to say something, maybe come with them and oh no, this is not happening, Jaebum has a tight grip at Youngjae’s arm so he can drag him along. They sit together, a lot of the seats are already taken but they find a nice place. Jaebum is still antsy but he doesn’t want Youngjae to feel awkward with him, he knows he is upset but there’s nothing Jaebum can do right now to change it apart from trying to distract him. It doesn’t work, Youngjae is cold, he won’t look directly at him and his replies are monosyllabic, Jaebum wants to cry, he can’t believe he is already messing it up and they are not even _together_ together yet.

They’ve been sitting there for almost two hours, Jaebum’s work will be the next one, Youngjae seems to be in a better mood, he is excited to see what Jaebum and his group did, he even smiles at Jaebum once. _Victory!_ Twenty five minutes later, the short film is over, Youngjae whispers in his ear, so he won’t disturb others, it sends shivers through Jaebum’s entire body.

“That was really great, I loved how you guys showed their lives, I wish it could be longer. I really enjoyed it,”

“I didn’t do much really,” Jaebum doesn’t want to blush but he can’t help it, thanks god it’s too dark here so Youngjae won’t be able to notice.

“Still, seeing your name on the credits made me really proud.” Jaebum can’t make out the look on his face, but he knows Youngjae well enough by now, he knows when he voice sounds off. And right now his voice sounds sad, he knows the other is genuinely proud of him but he can’t hide how sad he is and it’s killing Jaebum, he knows he did that. He shouldn’t have waited so long to talk to Youngjae about them being an item.

They watch two more short films but then there’s a break so people can go to the restroom or do whatever, it’s not too strict, they are at the film building, there’s people sitting everywhere even on the floor, they are drinking and eating, Jaebum is pretty sure he saw someone smoking on the back.

“I’m not feeling quite well, I guess I should leave, ok? Thanks for inviting me, I really like what I saw… my head is really killing me right now, can we talk about your film later? Maybe show me it again,” Youngjae gives him a new smile again, but this time Jaebum wishes he wouldn’t. It’s not a real smile, it’s a fake one, it doesn’t reach his eyes and he looks sadder than before.

“That’s fine, let me just talk to my professor first, yeah? I will be quick, then we can leave,”

“Jaebum, I can leave by myself, you stay here and enjoy your night, this is important to you, I wouldn’t want to ruin it because of a dumb headache.” Youngjae pats at his arm and since when do they give each other’s arms little pats? As if they are just acquaintance, fuck they are more than that.

“No, I’m leaving with you, we came together- you’re not ruining my night, come on, baby.” Youngjae just gives him a look, he doesn’t feel like talking anymore, that much is obvious so he just walks out of the building. Jaebum takes a few seconds to realize what is happening so he has to run to get to him.

Youngjae is in the middle of the parking lot, his pace too fast, Jaebum is not the best athlete in the world, so when he finally catches him he is breathless, he holds on Youngjae arm but then has to take two minutes to catch his breath again. Youngjae looks impatient asking him to just let go of him, but there’s no chance in hell that he is letting go.

“Let me talk you, Jae- baby. Come on, please, I know this night… it’s not like we expected but I was just so nervous.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, it’s okay to be nervous over something big. Sorry if I ruined it, it’s just I’m feeling weird, I’ll go home by myself you really don’t have to worry,”

Jaebum is so done with this mess, why does Youngjae looks so regretful? He didn’t ruin anything, goddamnit. “Stop apologizing, you didn’t do anything. I’m glad you came, I was nervous because you were here as my date.”

Realization seems to fall on Youngjae’s face but he doesn’t look relieved, actually he looks even more pained, has Jaebum been reading it wrong all along? Aren’t they at the same page? “Oh…” Big pause, Youngjae gulpes, he looks kinda pale too. “It’s- hum, it’s fine if you regretted it, but I-- I can’t do it anymore not like that, Jaebum. I like you too much to keep on doing this. I’m sorry, I love being with you but… this is getting to a point where it’s only hurting me, y’know? It hurts me not knowing where we stand, I don’t want to be like ‘what are we?’ but I don’t know what we are and I thought… I thought we were something but not… I wasn’t right obviously. So I think it’s better if we stop seeing each other, at least for the time being.”

Youngjae seems to be on the verge of tears and he is about to turn around so he can leave Jaebum here, and no, no, no, just no. This is not happening, he had everything planned he would confess and they would go back to Jaebum’s place together, Jinyoung is even spending the night at Jackson’s so they can be all alone. How did it go so wrong that now Youngjae thinks Jaebum doesn’t even like him back? Jaebum feels lost, god he is so bad at it.

“No, no, please listen to me, Youngjae, please.” Youngjae looks at his direction but he is not looking at his eyes, he is trying to hold up, but Jaebum can see the tears forming on the corner of his eyes. “Look at me, baby… it’s not like that.”

Youngjae looks right in his eyes, determination on his face even though a tear rolls down on it, “I didn’t expect anything from you, I knew what we were doing since the beginning, but then you started… you know what? It doesn’t matter right now, my point is I knew we were just hooking up no strings attached but I couldn’t help falling for you… I’m not saying it so you can say it back, but tonight I realized that I can’t be just friends, I like you so it’s better if we give it a break so I can get over it."

“I don’t want you to get over me!” Jaebum almost yells, then he walks closer to Youngjae so he can holds his face, his voice is lower now, he doesn’t want to startle him, “please, it’s not like that. I want it, to be with you, I want to be with you, Jae. Not as friends either, I want you to be my boyfriend."

“You do?” Youngjae doesn’t even look hopeful, he looks suspicious as if Jaebum would lie about something like that.

“Of course I do, I… I’m so gone on you, god can’t you see it? It’s so obvious. I- tonight it was supposed to be perfect, I made reservations to us at a restaurant I’m sure you would like so I would, I would confess… That’s why I’ve been so nervous the entire night, you look so good too and it made me even more nervous, I’ve wanted to be with you for so long now, but I don’t know how to do this, I have no idea- and now I’ve messed it up.”

Youngjae gives him a tiny smile, it’s not his big bright smile but it’s something, it’s better than the fake one that’s for sure. “You didn’t fuck anything up… do you really want to that? With me, I mean, you want to be with _me_? People here they are all over you, Jaebum. You are so cool too, you’re a film student I’m a biology one… we are not similar, it’s weird, why would you want to-”

“Nah, don’t say that,” Jaebum kisses at Youngjae’s cheeks, god it’s so cold out here, Youngjae’s face is so cold on his hands. He was so scared he would lose him, he feels so relieved that he is still here, that he likes Jaebum just as Jaebum likes him. “You know I’m not really cool, you know I’m a dork, this is all fake, the true me is the loser who likes to make bad puns and can’t go a day away from his cat, yeah? You know the real me, the real me likes you more than anything… also the real me is a mess who has no idea how to date or even confess to the boy he likes… but he is trying hard, ok? Please give me a chance, I won’t hurt you, I will take care of you. Please, baby, will you-”

Youngjae doesn’t answer with words, he kisses Jaebum hard, their lips are cold because of the weather, they are a little chapped too, but it feels amazing, Youngjae cold fingers come to his face as well and they are kissing and holding each other. Jaebum feels safe like he has never felt before.

“I want you to be my boyfriend.” Youngjae whispers in his mouth and hearing it is the best thing to happen to Jaebum since they met, Youngjae is the best thing to happen to him since ever. “You know what day is today?”

Jaebum nods kissing him again, they have to leave soon or they won’t be able to make it to the restaurant, also Jaebum’s balls are freezing out here but he just needs to kiss his _boyfriend_ again. He kisses him trying to show him exactly how he feels, show Youngjae just how in love with him he is even if he can’t say it out loud just yet. He tries to show Youngjae just how much he cares about him.

Jaebum wants to take care of Youngjae, he wants to do it right, he really doesn’t know how to do relationships but he wants to learn, he will fuck up a lot he knows he will but he doesn’t want to ever hurt Youngjae, he wants to be good to him, to be important to him, to be part of his life. He will do the best he can to make Youngjae smile his best smile at him everyday, he will try to unlock all the genuine smiles the boy keeps to him.

“Let’s go, it’s freezing here.” Jaebum says kissing at Youngjae’s cold nose.

Youngjae gives him  _The Favorite_ smile, holding Jaebum hand on his, “let’s go then, boyfriend.”

**Author's Note:**

> \- I really just wanted to write something light like that. I had the story on my mind last night and i couldn't sleep so i had to write it.  
> \- i hope you enjoyed it!


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